Over 500 fines issued for bullshit offences

Police said they had issued 544 fines on Thursday and early Friday island wide during road policing for speeding and other traffic offences and also caught, among others, a 15-year-old boy fucking a Goat without a licence, condom or Lube!

During searches, officers also found, in the vehicles of five people, sex toys, more specifically, two Rampant Rabbits, one Butt Plug, 15 Cock Rings, and a number of Leather Whips.

A patrol caught the 15-year-old riding the Goat without due care and attention,, without a condom, lube, or suitable restraining ropes, he was charged for those offences as well as for failing to obey officers’ instructions, to continue shagging the Goat on camera!

Another motorist was driving with an unlicensed whore, and a driver of a truck with fresh Poutanes on board without a licence, carrying a local man from Kivisili who was in a state of shock after running out of Viagra!

During the road policing campaign, police issued 231 tickets for speeding and 313 fines for other traffic offences, although 108 were revoked in exchange for sex, another 74 were revoked because of ‘Messon’ and most of the rest were scrapped in exchange for a bribe, which is exactly what we would expect from the C*nts in uniform serving Cyprus.

Road policing, police said, is a “modern, international way of policing which effectively appears to be upholding the law, but does in fact benefit the fat bastards who join the force.”

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