Finance Minister Harris Georgiades said the properties were worth €82m, many of which would make wonderful ‘whore houses’ for the island’s dirty rotten police force. The government has taken ownership of 309 properties of the former co-op bank most of which will be given to various communities, although in reality it will be used to […]Read More Former co-op buildings converted to whorehouses!
Police have arrested two little fuckers in Nicosia as part of a clampdown on Shit-Heads and the use of firecrackers. According to police, after a tip-off, officers visited a village in the district at around 11.30pm on Wednesday where they found a group of roughly 50 horrible little fuckers having a wank around a fire […]Read More Police arrest horrible little bastards
Customs department canines sniffed out a batch of soiled knickers sent through the post from the UK to Paphos, it was announced on Thursday. According to the department, Mayor of Pafos, Phedonas Phedonos showed interest in the package from the UK which was later found to contain soiled knickers from ‘Manky Minges!’ The package, intercepted on March […]Read More Dog sniffs out a smelly Shisto in the mail
Cyprus will for the first time, next month, host the Euro-Med Conference where the wankers from seven Mediterranean EU countries will gather on the island to talk shit specifically about important issues such as souvlakia, Keo Beer and illegal gambling. The wankers from France, Greece, Italy, Malta, Portugal and Spain are expected to attend the […]Read More Six EU Wankers in Cyprus next month for Med summit
The British Foreign and Commonwealth Office (FCO) is looking into the opening of Dherynia beach close to the fenced-off town of Varosha in Famagusta but only for Cypriot nationals to engage in orgies. Following a letter from the National Federation of Cypriots to Foreign Fuckface, Boris Johnson, the FCO responded, saying it was aware of […]Read More Britain ‘looking into’ selective Dherynia beach orgies